Well.. on many occasions I have been the one that my friends turn to for help with their relationships. If I had a dime for every person on the Internet I have talked to, helping them out with their relationships, I would be a rich man today :).. Since I was very young.. I thought a lot about relationships, seeing them around me, being in them, looking at how they worked. Reading a lot about human nature, and my studies of the spiritual nature of humanity has really given me an insight into the ways people “relate”.
Communication
That is what I believe makes the very foundation of ANY relationship. Whom ever you are with, you must have the ability to effectively share your thoughts, feelings, and ideas with each other. The most common break down of most relationships is due to lack of or poor communication with each other. This can happen in many ways which I will illustrate in this example.
A couple get into an argument.. she says.. “You never take me anywhere, you don’t love me!” and the man replies, “What are you talking about? I tell you that I love you everyday!!” Now, what are we seeing here? I really do believe they love each other.. but their understanding of how each other communicate is very poor. The woman in this case communicates on what is called a kinesthetic level. She understand the feeling in love in what is done.. she has to feel it with doing things with her mate. On the other hand, the man understands love through auditory input, in what is said. He understands the feeling and ideal of love in the words “I love you” more then anything else. Him telling her everyday that he loves her, as far as he can understand, should be enough! For her though.. it’s the things he does that matter, if he takes her out, or buys her things. In these ways she can see the “action” put forth that communicates the love.
When we look at the situation, it has nothing to do with if they love each other or not, it’s the way they communicate it to each other that is causing the misunderstanding, and thus miscommunicating to each other what they really feel. Now just because they have different ways of understanding and communicating does not mean they cannot have a successful relationship, it just means they have to become aware of their partners way of understanding and communicating things. Unfortunately, the majority of people in society are not ever given any kind of education in this respect.
Relationships go beyond just you and the other person.. a successful relationship is one where you are not looking at eachother, but rather, you are both looking in the same direction. It’s the vision that both of you share that matters most.
Personally, in my life, I am not a believer in relationships as they are commonly believed in now. I will not get involved in a relationship with a woman unless I KNOW from the beginning that it’s going to lead to marriage. Some might say, “But, love might grow”… no no no .. see.. you know from the start… IF you know what you are looking for.. and I do. I know the kinds of values, attributes, sexiness, and dreams I want my future wife to be to have.. it will all compliement my own really. I am not being unrealistic really in what I am expecting, just wanting the best, rather the the mediocre like most people have come to settle for when it comes to relationships (I hear it ALL the time.. mostly from woman afraid to be alone and that they won’t find a real man).
I consider myself as someone on a journal to meet my lifemate, however, it’s not going to happen till I have gotten things clear for myself in my own life. Sooo until then, I will continue to journey on. I don’t mind meeting girls and going out and having a good time.. but I am very particular about them understanding that it’s not going to develop into a relationship.. if I have already decided that they don’t have what I’m looking for. I guess you could say 1st impressions are pretty important to me 
… no.. I don’t judge to quickly.. I simply know what I want.. and if you ever had a conversation with me… you know I find out quickly if the girl I’m with has it or not. .. It’s amazing what an hour with me over a cappucino will reveal ..
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